Friday, March 27,2009
Well here is the real picture!
When a man wants to get married he has to wait until he has enough money to pay for a bride. A couple meets and falls in love; most marriages are not arranged any more except for in the remote villages; but it may take three or four years for the man to earn enough. The uncle of the bride receives the dowry not the parents, so the uncles will push for the girls to marry when they are very young.
Our liaison, Maureen, went to a university on a scholarship and her parents really had to fight the uncle because he wanted to marry her off. The family has never recovered because Maureen never married and since she is now 40 the uncle knows that she is past marrying age and he will never receive his due.
Once a couple is married the bride cannot even call her husband by his first name. She must call him Mr. Garner. During the first years of marriage the wife must bow down on one knee when she serves him food. She has to serve every member of his family the same way. If he brings the rest of his family to live with them the wife must wash their clothes, cook, and clean for them.
If she does not serve well enough she will be beaten by the husband’s family and they can ask for the bridal price back. She may be beaten by her own relatives because they have already spent the dowry and cannot afford to return it.
Of course I am such an obedient wife so our housekeeper and cook get such a kick out of me. Brad has asked them to teach me, but as soon as he leaves they whisper to me, “I support you – you do not need to change.” He tells them he is going to get a Zambian wife. One said, “Good, leave Sydney here.” The women have no voice. Every once in a while I bow down and call Brad, Mr. Garner and then I give the girls a ‘thumbs up’ they just giggle.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Friday, March 20, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Today Brad went to visit Samson, a blind man that he met several weeks ago. He tried to visit him before because he was sure he remembered where he lived. He started out and about an hour later he returned. I asked him how his visit was and he said he got lost.
Getting lost here is not the same as is it in the States. Here there are no street signs, no houses, no roads, just a path that may have a fork, and another fork, trees, grass (very tall grass) which often times prevents you from seeing too far ahead. Brad has always had a good sense of direction, so he did make it home.
He said he would try again, of course without asking directions. He said he knew the path to take he just must have taken the wrong fork in the road. Next time he would take the left fork and he was sure he would make it. One day I said show me the path. He said, “That one there.” I asked him if he was sure it was that one or 15 yards away there was another path. Then he was confused, so he had someone take him yesterday.
Samson’s wife met him on the road and said she knew a shortcut. Brad said he tried to remember the way but it was impossible. There are no land marks and shortcuts usually mean a six inch wide path or sometimes no path at all. On the way home he decided to follow the larger path, 18’ wide and he made it.
He had a great visit and is planning to go back two times next week. Samson was a teacher for many years, so they had a lot in common. The only time Samson gets out of his house is on Sunday when his wife takes him to church. Brad is trying to think of something he could buy to help Samson pass the time. Samson has a radio, so if any of you have any ideas let us know.
Only a two more weeks and we will be on our way home.
Today Brad went to visit Samson, a blind man that he met several weeks ago. He tried to visit him before because he was sure he remembered where he lived. He started out and about an hour later he returned. I asked him how his visit was and he said he got lost.
Getting lost here is not the same as is it in the States. Here there are no street signs, no houses, no roads, just a path that may have a fork, and another fork, trees, grass (very tall grass) which often times prevents you from seeing too far ahead. Brad has always had a good sense of direction, so he did make it home.
He said he would try again, of course without asking directions. He said he knew the path to take he just must have taken the wrong fork in the road. Next time he would take the left fork and he was sure he would make it. One day I said show me the path. He said, “That one there.” I asked him if he was sure it was that one or 15 yards away there was another path. Then he was confused, so he had someone take him yesterday.
Samson’s wife met him on the road and said she knew a shortcut. Brad said he tried to remember the way but it was impossible. There are no land marks and shortcuts usually mean a six inch wide path or sometimes no path at all. On the way home he decided to follow the larger path, 18’ wide and he made it.
He had a great visit and is planning to go back two times next week. Samson was a teacher for many years, so they had a lot in common. The only time Samson gets out of his house is on Sunday when his wife takes him to church. Brad is trying to think of something he could buy to help Samson pass the time. Samson has a radio, so if any of you have any ideas let us know.
Only a two more weeks and we will be on our way home.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Tuesday, March 17,2002
I ususally send a story to my students every week for the substitue to read to them. I thought you might like this one.
A Good Cockroach Story
The hot pads that you put under hot dishes are made out of grass here. They are woven together very tightly. We have six of these that we use all the time. We have to hit them on the wall or counter before we use them because cockroaches can crawl into them and hide. When the roaches fall out we step on them or do a quick step dance to get as many as we can.
Well we finally moved into our new building last Friday and we were very careful not to bring any roaches with us. We banged those hot pad holders well and brought them along. Last night at dinner when we had three guests a roach stuck his head out of one of the holders but did not come out. When a roach does get on the table everyone grabs dishes and lifts them up while one student tries to kill it. A student saw this roach but did not want to be rude and did not want our guests to have to grab plates. The student kept an eye on the holder just in case the roach did crawl out. The roach started out many times during the meal but never came out all the way.
While we were cleaning up the student placed all the grass hot pads on the floor and sprayed them with Raid. After about 20 minutes I picked them up and banged them on the wall to make sure no other roaches were hiding. As I banged out fell about 20-30 dead baby roaches. It was so gross. We sprayed the holders again and then put them in the freezer. We will be putting these in the freezer for 24 hours every week just in case.
We learned if we buy anything here that is woven or made of wood we need to put the items in the freezer of 24 hours before we come home to make sure we are not carrying any critters home with us.
One night while we lived in the other house I went into the kitchen at night and flicked on the light and it looked like the whole counter was moving as a wave of roaches ran for cover. I almost gagged. From then on we left the light on in the kitchen until we went to bed and I never walked into a dark kitchen again.
I ususally send a story to my students every week for the substitue to read to them. I thought you might like this one.
A Good Cockroach Story
The hot pads that you put under hot dishes are made out of grass here. They are woven together very tightly. We have six of these that we use all the time. We have to hit them on the wall or counter before we use them because cockroaches can crawl into them and hide. When the roaches fall out we step on them or do a quick step dance to get as many as we can.
Well we finally moved into our new building last Friday and we were very careful not to bring any roaches with us. We banged those hot pad holders well and brought them along. Last night at dinner when we had three guests a roach stuck his head out of one of the holders but did not come out. When a roach does get on the table everyone grabs dishes and lifts them up while one student tries to kill it. A student saw this roach but did not want to be rude and did not want our guests to have to grab plates. The student kept an eye on the holder just in case the roach did crawl out. The roach started out many times during the meal but never came out all the way.
While we were cleaning up the student placed all the grass hot pads on the floor and sprayed them with Raid. After about 20 minutes I picked them up and banged them on the wall to make sure no other roaches were hiding. As I banged out fell about 20-30 dead baby roaches. It was so gross. We sprayed the holders again and then put them in the freezer. We will be putting these in the freezer for 24 hours every week just in case.
We learned if we buy anything here that is woven or made of wood we need to put the items in the freezer of 24 hours before we come home to make sure we are not carrying any critters home with us.
One night while we lived in the other house I went into the kitchen at night and flicked on the light and it looked like the whole counter was moving as a wave of roaches ran for cover. I almost gagged. From then on we left the light on in the kitchen until we went to bed and I never walked into a dark kitchen again.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Monday, March 10, 2009
Well we have internet about one day out of five and about three minutes out of an hour, so I will posts two entries today if possible.
Brad will be preaching again this Sunday. He and his pastor have become buds. The pastor wanted to take him to Malawi, a neighboring country, so they could be a tag team at a conference. We cannot cross country lines because of our visas without paying and going through several custom officials. Most of the time they just bribe someone to get what they want. It is such a common practice that even Christians do it; otherwise, you would not get your electricity turned on or a building inspected.
Brad is feeling better. The doctor contacted him on Friday and wanted to see him on Monday again, so we went. Brad’s blood pressure was fine and the doctor repeated the malaria test and blood sugar test again. Malaria was negative, but his blood sugar was still borderline. The doctor suggested five meals a day instead of three so we will try that. He has lost 20 pounds.
Brad really enjoyed the visiting professors which eased his stress and gave him time to just talk. Women do not talk more than men. They talked about silly stuff and dumb men movies, but it was good for him so I stayed away.
I started helping with the children’s program at our church a couple of weeks ago. When the children left the service, I left and volunteered my services. The Zambian people are so gracious and humble; they welcomed me in. The teacher told me what the story would be, started, then left. I thought she would be right back so I waited. The children started getting restless so I thought I would review what happened before Pharaoh let the people go. I reviewed the plagues and the teacher finally returned.
This past Sunday I returned and the teacher said, “What are you going to teach?” I told her I did not know I was to teach, but asked what the lesson was. She said whatever story I wanted to tell, so I continued with Moses. They divided the class into two and gave me the older ones and they took the preschoolers outside. We did the manna and the quail.
They have no materials at all. Last week they used the back of bulletins from the States to draw on. They had six pencils that were about four inches long and one container of crayons which they had broken so everyone could have a piece.
This Sunday, I took the 53 pencils which we use for the art program and in my class I had two pencils left. Two more students showed up late, so God provided. The students were so glad to use a pencil with an eraser.
Can you imagine 53 children ages 5-10 in a 10 x 10 room? Plus there were three tables, a stove, three bikes, a wheelbarrow, fencing, and some broken chairs. The students sat on every available item. Children’s Church lasts 90 minutes. Some of the students had infants on their back.
We had a wonderful time acting out the story, reacting out the story, and drawing pictures of people collecting manna and quail. They laughed and laughed at my quail. We played a game and sang songs in Tonga. I found a broken drum and they took turns beating it to the rhythm of the song. I looked at my watch and we still had 20 minutes before the sermon would be over.
We were having so much fun that they sent in all the preschoolers to join us, but no adults. Now I had over 70 children. I picked up the drum and said follow me and out we went. We marched around the church and sang at the top of our voices. Church miraculously ended 10 minutes early.
We continued to sing, but I only let girls beat the drum because it was a holiday, “Women’s Day”. The rest of the church members stared at us as they did the handshake, where you shake everyone’s hand in a big circle (which takes another 20 minutes).
Next week I will be prepared for the whole 90 minutes with activities and supplies.
I know that you are praying for us because God is providing.
Well we have internet about one day out of five and about three minutes out of an hour, so I will posts two entries today if possible.
Brad will be preaching again this Sunday. He and his pastor have become buds. The pastor wanted to take him to Malawi, a neighboring country, so they could be a tag team at a conference. We cannot cross country lines because of our visas without paying and going through several custom officials. Most of the time they just bribe someone to get what they want. It is such a common practice that even Christians do it; otherwise, you would not get your electricity turned on or a building inspected.
Brad is feeling better. The doctor contacted him on Friday and wanted to see him on Monday again, so we went. Brad’s blood pressure was fine and the doctor repeated the malaria test and blood sugar test again. Malaria was negative, but his blood sugar was still borderline. The doctor suggested five meals a day instead of three so we will try that. He has lost 20 pounds.
Brad really enjoyed the visiting professors which eased his stress and gave him time to just talk. Women do not talk more than men. They talked about silly stuff and dumb men movies, but it was good for him so I stayed away.
I started helping with the children’s program at our church a couple of weeks ago. When the children left the service, I left and volunteered my services. The Zambian people are so gracious and humble; they welcomed me in. The teacher told me what the story would be, started, then left. I thought she would be right back so I waited. The children started getting restless so I thought I would review what happened before Pharaoh let the people go. I reviewed the plagues and the teacher finally returned.
This past Sunday I returned and the teacher said, “What are you going to teach?” I told her I did not know I was to teach, but asked what the lesson was. She said whatever story I wanted to tell, so I continued with Moses. They divided the class into two and gave me the older ones and they took the preschoolers outside. We did the manna and the quail.
They have no materials at all. Last week they used the back of bulletins from the States to draw on. They had six pencils that were about four inches long and one container of crayons which they had broken so everyone could have a piece.
This Sunday, I took the 53 pencils which we use for the art program and in my class I had two pencils left. Two more students showed up late, so God provided. The students were so glad to use a pencil with an eraser.
Can you imagine 53 children ages 5-10 in a 10 x 10 room? Plus there were three tables, a stove, three bikes, a wheelbarrow, fencing, and some broken chairs. The students sat on every available item. Children’s Church lasts 90 minutes. Some of the students had infants on their back.
We had a wonderful time acting out the story, reacting out the story, and drawing pictures of people collecting manna and quail. They laughed and laughed at my quail. We played a game and sang songs in Tonga. I found a broken drum and they took turns beating it to the rhythm of the song. I looked at my watch and we still had 20 minutes before the sermon would be over.
We were having so much fun that they sent in all the preschoolers to join us, but no adults. Now I had over 70 children. I picked up the drum and said follow me and out we went. We marched around the church and sang at the top of our voices. Church miraculously ended 10 minutes early.
We continued to sing, but I only let girls beat the drum because it was a holiday, “Women’s Day”. The rest of the church members stared at us as they did the handshake, where you shake everyone’s hand in a big circle (which takes another 20 minutes).
Next week I will be prepared for the whole 90 minutes with activities and supplies.
I know that you are praying for us because God is providing.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
We are settling in to our smaller family lifestyle with just the four remaining students. It is very peaceful.
Last Sunday our pastor encouraged the congregation to visit one of their members that was in the hospital and has no family. When you are in the hospital here your family must bring you food because the hospital does not provide it. One student was touched by this and asked the pastor if she could visit the man.
The week came and went and nothing was done about it. We try not to make the students serve, but let them take the initiate. Friday the student called the pastor and found out that the man had been released from the hospital so today, Saturday the 7th, three of us went to visit him.
We cooked a hot meal and froze three more meals. Most homes do not have any type of refrigeration. We took him a 20 pound bag of mealy meal, their staple food. We also took two shirts and a pair of trousers. Many of the students that returned to the States left clothing behind. I found two shirts that were smaller and a pair of trousers that were a 34 Long. Most Zambian men are 5’10” or shorter and very thin. I figured he could roll them up and tighten his belt.
We took a cab to the church which is about 1½ miles, to meet the pastor who was going to take us to the home. We had planned to walk home since we would be empty handed. The pastor asked if we thought we could carry all of our gifts. We figured since the man lived in the neighborhood it wouldn’t be a problem. They consider the neighborhood to be larger than we thought. We were going to walk two miles to the man’s house and two miles back to the church and then the 1 ½ miles home.
He left to get his bicycle so he would put our load in the carrier. While he was gone I said, “Let’s pray that these will be the shortest two miles we have ever walked." So we stood outside by the church and prayed. When the pastor returned he corrected himself by saying it was 2km which is only a little more than a mile. Thank you God!
We barely knew it was a mile. As he pushed the bike, Pastor Munga talked about his life and asked us questions. We only stayed 40 minutes with Allan Shipunde, the man recovering from malaria. One student read a Psalm, the other read a prayer inserting Allan’s name into it while the Pastor translated. I prayed for him and we gave him our gifts. Allan happened to be a tall man so the trousers will not have to be rolled up after all. God thinks of everything.
We took a couple of pictures so we would remember to pray for him and we left. The walk back was over before we knew it. It was wonderful to get to know our pastor so well and learn about the history of the church.
The area where Allan lived is in the slums of Choma. Only a handful of Zambians own their own homes, so when they come out of the hospital they no longer have a home unless a family member takes them in. Part of this area is used what we would call a nursing home. There are five or six small one room homes in a cluster. The landlord lives in one of the homes and rents the others out to the sick. Our pastor said it would cost about $4.00 a month, but an average worker makes about $20.00 a month.
These homes are about four feet by eight feet concrete brick with flat tin roofs and dirt floors. No furniture, no water, no electricity - no nothing. They have the clothes on their back and maybe a blanket if they are lucky– that’s all. Allan used an old car battery for a step to his house which also doubled for a chair. The landlord cooks outside for the people who live in her/his huts. They share food which is usually one meal a day.
There were probably five square miles of these cluster homes. Sharing a room in a nursing home sounds pretty good.
I will be writing more since our life has settled down.
Brad is still feeling dizzy and tired. He read the labels on his medicines and found out that one of his regular prescriptions and the malaria pills cite dizziness as a common reaction which he was taking at the same time every day. He is going to try to take one in the morning and one at night to see if that helps. The chocolate and rest prescription was not helping; although, he has enjoyed it.
Thanks for your prayers.
We are settling in to our smaller family lifestyle with just the four remaining students. It is very peaceful.
Last Sunday our pastor encouraged the congregation to visit one of their members that was in the hospital and has no family. When you are in the hospital here your family must bring you food because the hospital does not provide it. One student was touched by this and asked the pastor if she could visit the man.
The week came and went and nothing was done about it. We try not to make the students serve, but let them take the initiate. Friday the student called the pastor and found out that the man had been released from the hospital so today, Saturday the 7th, three of us went to visit him.
We cooked a hot meal and froze three more meals. Most homes do not have any type of refrigeration. We took him a 20 pound bag of mealy meal, their staple food. We also took two shirts and a pair of trousers. Many of the students that returned to the States left clothing behind. I found two shirts that were smaller and a pair of trousers that were a 34 Long. Most Zambian men are 5’10” or shorter and very thin. I figured he could roll them up and tighten his belt.
We took a cab to the church which is about 1½ miles, to meet the pastor who was going to take us to the home. We had planned to walk home since we would be empty handed. The pastor asked if we thought we could carry all of our gifts. We figured since the man lived in the neighborhood it wouldn’t be a problem. They consider the neighborhood to be larger than we thought. We were going to walk two miles to the man’s house and two miles back to the church and then the 1 ½ miles home.
He left to get his bicycle so he would put our load in the carrier. While he was gone I said, “Let’s pray that these will be the shortest two miles we have ever walked." So we stood outside by the church and prayed. When the pastor returned he corrected himself by saying it was 2km which is only a little more than a mile. Thank you God!
We barely knew it was a mile. As he pushed the bike, Pastor Munga talked about his life and asked us questions. We only stayed 40 minutes with Allan Shipunde, the man recovering from malaria. One student read a Psalm, the other read a prayer inserting Allan’s name into it while the Pastor translated. I prayed for him and we gave him our gifts. Allan happened to be a tall man so the trousers will not have to be rolled up after all. God thinks of everything.
We took a couple of pictures so we would remember to pray for him and we left. The walk back was over before we knew it. It was wonderful to get to know our pastor so well and learn about the history of the church.
The area where Allan lived is in the slums of Choma. Only a handful of Zambians own their own homes, so when they come out of the hospital they no longer have a home unless a family member takes them in. Part of this area is used what we would call a nursing home. There are five or six small one room homes in a cluster. The landlord lives in one of the homes and rents the others out to the sick. Our pastor said it would cost about $4.00 a month, but an average worker makes about $20.00 a month.
These homes are about four feet by eight feet concrete brick with flat tin roofs and dirt floors. No furniture, no water, no electricity - no nothing. They have the clothes on their back and maybe a blanket if they are lucky– that’s all. Allan used an old car battery for a step to his house which also doubled for a chair. The landlord cooks outside for the people who live in her/his huts. They share food which is usually one meal a day.
There were probably five square miles of these cluster homes. Sharing a room in a nursing home sounds pretty good.
I will be writing more since our life has settled down.
Brad is still feeling dizzy and tired. He read the labels on his medicines and found out that one of his regular prescriptions and the malaria pills cite dizziness as a common reaction which he was taking at the same time every day. He is going to try to take one in the morning and one at night to see if that helps. The chocolate and rest prescription was not helping; although, he has enjoyed it.
Thanks for your prayers.
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